{"id":2573,"date":"2025-04-29T13:50:28","date_gmt":"2025-04-29T17:50:28","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/inspirationallaroundme.org\/index.php\/2025\/04\/29\/has-that-girl-gone-mad\/"},"modified":"2025-04-29T13:50:28","modified_gmt":"2025-04-29T17:50:28","slug":"has-that-girl-gone-mad","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/inspirationallaroundme.org\/index.php\/2025\/04\/29\/has-that-girl-gone-mad\/","title":{"rendered":"Has that girl gone mad?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

I had come home from work yesterday mentally exhausted. As soon as I walked through the door, I noticed it was unusually hot. So I thought, \u201cnot this again, I do not have the time or the resources for this!\u201d Just what I dreaded, our air went out. I had just talked to Matt a couple of weeks ago telling him good it was working and the house was nice and cool and then this happened. After the blessed weekend I had with Dolly\u2019s House, it\u2019s like everything was going down the drain RAPIDLY! <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Every time the phone rang, it\u2019s like everything was bad, negative, or depressing. I felt like the walls were beginning to cave in and I was running out of gas and could not rub fast enough in the opposite direction. I was literally running out of gas figuratively and actually. I had to tell my boys they would miss basketball practice because we just didn\u2019t have it. William says \u201cmom I have $7 dollars you can have it. We are out of water so can we go to Sam\u2019s and get some water and put the rest in gas.\u201d I explained to William that $7 would not be enough for the gas tank but I would go get the water. Emmanuel comes with $16 dollars and says, \u201chere Ma you can use this for gas.\u201d Then Micah comes upstairs and says, \u201cMa whats my social security number, I\u2019m going to try to get a job and help out.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I went in the kitchen and the tears began to pour down both sides of my cheeks. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

William came in and said, \u201cMa why are you crying, it\u2019s going to be okay. Let\u2019s go get the gas and some fresh air, it\u2019s going to be Okay.\u201d I asked William does he believe God hears his prayers. He replied, \u201cyes God hears my prayers and He answers.\u201d Of course I already knew the answer and so I proceeded to ask him to please pray for me. I told him that I\u2019m already working so much but it\u2019s still not enough and I need to do more. He asked me if I was going to DoorDash and I told him I didn\u2019t have the gas to do it. He gave me a hug and he wiped my tears. William is my source of encouragement when I feel like I\u2019m failing as a mother, he gives me strength to keep going, no matter how tough the road is. Like my father, he always has the right words to say to make things better. <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

So listening to William I decided to go get gas and get the water, I can\u2019t do City of Columbia spicket water, it tastes like dirt (in my opinion). After getting gas the $7 dollars he said he wanted to give me for gas he said could he use to get him some body wash, I agreed because it\u2019s not fair to take his money so we went to CVS so I could use my coupon that was set to expire soon. We got back home and he said, \u201cMa can we please go to practice, it\u2019s hot in the house anyway so you can come inside the gym and get some fresh air.\u201d I didn\u2019t want to sit in the gym listening to musky boys bounce the ball and run up and down the court. I didn\u2019t want to drive to Lugoff knowing I needed that gas to make it to work and to take Micah to school the next day. I truly didn\u2019t want to be around anyone, I just wanted to sit alone in my thoughts. <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

If anyone knows me and my children, I have a soft spot for them. So you know that means, we were headed out of the door for Lugoff. Although it was Emmanuel and Williams practice, Micah decided to go for the first time. I dropped them off and decided to go to the grocery store in Lugoff to get ingredients needed for my part time job. Luckily I had the company credit card, because I wouldn\u2019t have been getting anything but a lent sandwich if they were depending on my money. Not wanting to be waste gas, I headed back to the school the boys were at and I sat under the most beautiful tree! She had the longest branches and most beautiful leaves that provided the most amazing shade and created a beautiful breeze. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Photo taken by Whitnee\u2019 <\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

As I sat there I had been in conversation with Kelly, Mrs. Rita, Faith & Anna from talks about the air conditioning, situations with folks I love and were hurting for, knee pain from stepping of the side walk the wrong way, etc. But all I knew is the comfort I received from sitting under this tree, nothing really mattered while I was under the tree. It\u2019s not that I didn\u2019t care about my problems, but I felt so secure, cared for, loved, and alright under this tree. It\u2019s like God wrapped His loving arms around me through this tree and the cool breeze was like Him reassuring me that every little thing would be okay. <\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

God comforted my soul! It was in this moment that I began to relax and give the worries, the anxiety, the stress, the uncertainty of it all to God. He truly lifted my burden, my heavy load. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

So one night ask, so what about your air? What about your gas? What about water? How you going to feed your kids? Cook in a hot house? How you going to get to work? How? Why? When? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I had no answers.<\/strong> The only thing I knew to do in those moments was trust God. That\u2019s all I ever know how to do. I work so I don\u2019t have to ask people for stuff, but there are times I still fall short. I don\u2019t have mommy or daddy to depend on and Rico helps as much as he can, so without bothering anyone or being a Felicia, all I know how to do is depend on God- that\u2019s all I\u2019ve ever known deep down inside but it took me loosing both of my parents to really truly understand that. It\u2019s a lesson I wished I learned and understood while I still had them. <\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Practice was over and it was time to go home. Rico had gotten to the house and had dinner cooked. The thermostat said it was 82 degrees yet with the fans blowing it wasn\u2019t that unbearable. The time was about 8:50, late and with SC Ready testing in the morning the boys needed to get in the bed. They took cold showers and went to bed and I sat in my birthday suite enjoying the breeze looking at Amazon\u2019s\u2019 website dreaming of the accessories I wanted in my car. Car insurance is so high these days but there is nothing wrong with a girl dreaming right?! <\/p>\n\n\n\n

RIGHT!!!!!! <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Reading this message one might ask, has that girl gone mad? <\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

How could she sit here in a hot house after having to borrow money from her 12 year and 13 year old, and be thinking about accessories to put in a car?! The answer is, I haven\u2019t gone mad. I haven\u2019t \u201clost my marbles.\u201d I decided to cast my cares to the Lord. I decided to trust Him. You see with payday looming around the corner, I knew the direct deposit could hit early, I could be going through my pocketbook and find a $20 wrapped in a receipt like before, or who knows what could happen. I don\u2019t know BUT GOD KNOWS! <\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Shortly after I dozed off and all was well with my soul. I woke up thanking God I was able to sleep comfortably underneath the fan (even though I was afraid I would get a cold). I had a slight headache but I didn\u2019t let that stop me. I got Micah off to school and I got to work and I was thankful for the $16 dollars that got me here safely. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I want to tell you all how God ministered to me specifically. I want to tell you how I am so grateful for parents who raised me to be how I am. I\u2019m so grateful that I inherited their giving spirit. Ya\u2019ll God placed it on my heart to share with you all not looking for a handout (because I work- a full time job, a part time job, catering on the side) and I rub my nonprofit and this website that costs me money but I\u2019m not going to die with money and sometimes too tired to enjoy it when I do have, but God always provides. I put that out there because by no form or fashion do I want anyone to miss my point and focusing on MY FINANCES, they belong to God, and it\u2019s going to be alright, it always is. Even when I struggle, it\u2019s always okay and will be okay. <\/em>So focus let me tell y\u2019all about how good my God is: <\/p>\n\n\n\n