Whitnee's journey with Christ

Scripture reading: Proverbs 2:1-5 (NIV)

“Give ear, O Heavens, and I will speak, and let the earth hear the words of my mouth. May my teaching drop as the rain, my speech distill as dew, like gentle rain upon the tender grass, and like showers upon the herb. -Deuteronomy 32:1-2

Looking at my mom and how faithful she is makes me think of the verse in the Bible that says, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weaknesses, So that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, and insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”-2 Corinthians 12:9-10

When I whisper to my mom and tell her how strong she is; her eyes say I can do nothing on my own. When I feel the gentleness of her skin, and rub her swollen hands, I know she is telling the Lord let Your will be done. When I see the single tear droplet fall from her swollen cheek, I know her eyes are upon the Lord and He hears her cry.

My mom taught my brother and I to trust in the Lord and lean not on our own understanding. So I hear my mom through her silence saying, “Whitnee’ be still, and know that He is God. We exalt the name of God right now in this place.

I’ve quieted myself and listen ever so clearly to the words of God. I have applied my heart to gain His knowledge, just as my mom has.

My mom has offered up her body as a living sacrifice to the Lord and as I sit and wait, wait and pray, trust and praise, worship and glorify I hear God’s voice speaking to me. I watch and wait while God heals my moms body. I watch and wait while the miracle is unfolding beneath my very own eyes. What a gift! A gift that only can come from God.

With this pandemic, the protests, the lewd acts, the riots, the sickness, death, and troubles of this world to find peace in such a solemn way. Who knew I could find so much joy beside my moms bedside. People thank me and call me a life saver, but I thank God for giving me life, strength, eyes and ears, endurance, knowledge, and the time to help my mom fight. But that’s just it, she doesn’t need my help. I needed hers!

I needed to see God is this tangible way. I needed this to help me fight stronger without growing weary. I needed to see this to step aside completely. Though I felt like I was helpless because I couldn’t stop my moms pain, I couldn’t help her aching body, I couldn’t provide the nutrients she needed, but God! My relationship to Him got deeper, my cry has given me peace, my joy more radiant. I know where my help comes from!

In the book of Hebrews the Bible says, therefore we must pay much closer attention to what we have heard, lest we drift away from it. These valley experiences with my mom have been mountain experiences in Christ. I’ve shut my mouth and opened up my heart.

When I found out they had to take my mom back to ICU, I cried. I couldn’t help myself, I tried to hold it in but the tears kept coming. My mom with the little strength she had signaled for her phone. I gave it to her and she played The Battle Is Not Yours by Yolanda Adams. The nurse, the respiratory therapist, transport team, my mom and I had a praise break on the way to ICU with blood pouring out her mouth- we blessed the name of our Heavenly Father.

Thank you mom for giving me the advice of the wise in your silence. Thank you God for opening my eyes so I would not be foolish anymore. I have join my mother being in good spirits knowing that God has it all worked out. He knows what the end game is and we trust Him wholeheartedly.

God I thank you for allowing me to see more truth and my moms silence leading me to it in this experience. I’m sorry it took her being diagnosed a second time for me to give it my all to trust Him without an ounce of doubt.

This morning I need you to rejoice with me and celebrate the goodness of our Lord. He is worthy of all my praise and I give Him the glory in this place. I remember His goodness and I see it in a tangible way besides my moms bedside. Lord I thank you for her strength, I thank you for her courage, her wisdom, her strength, her faith, her strong mind, and Lord I thank you for allowing her to raise my brother and I to know who You are.

I encourage you to help build our community back up from the ground up by starting on your knees with Christ. I encourage you to know where there is no guidance, a person falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety.

God I ask that you bless Your people in a way only you can do they too can be strong and still keep the faith like my mom in times when the waves and currents seem to be so strong, but stand tall and know You are God and God alone.

I will end with Habakkuk 2:1, I will take my stand at my watch post and station myself on the tower, and look out to see what he will say to me, and what I will answer concerning my complaint.

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