Falling short, Lord please forgive me.

4 Now God has left us that promise that we may enter and have his rest. Let us be very careful, then, so that none of you will fail to get that rest. 2 The Good News was preached to us just as it was to them. But the teaching they heard did not help them. They heard it but did not accept it with faith.[a] 3 We who have believed are able to enter and have God’s rest. As God has said,

“So I was angry and made a promise.
‘They will never enter my land of rest.’” Psalm 95:11
But God’s work was finished from the time he made the world. 4 Somewhere in the Scriptures he talked about the seventh day of the week: “And on the seventh day God rested from all his work.”[b] 5 And again in the Scripture God said, “They will never enter my land of rest.”

6 It is still true that some people will enter and have God’s rest. But those who first heard the way to be saved did not enter. They did not enter because they did not obey. 7 So God planned another day, called “today.” He spoke about that day through David a long time later. It is the same Scripture used before:

“Today listen to what he says.
Do not be stubborn.” Psalm 95:7-8
8 We know that Joshua[c] did not lead the people into that rest. We know this because God spoke later about another day. 9 This shows that the seventh-day rest[d] for God’s people is still coming. 10 For anyone who enters and has God’s rest will rest from his work as God did. 11 So let us try as hard as we can to enter God’s rest. We must try hard so that no one will be lost by following the example of those who refused to obey.

12 God’s word is alive and working. It is sharper than a sword sharpened on both sides. It cuts all the way into us, where the soul and the spirit are joined. It cuts to the center of our joints and our bones. And God’s word judges the thoughts and feelings in our hearts. 13 Nothing in all the world can be hidden from God. Everything is clear and lies open before him. And to him we must explain the way we have lived.

Jesus Is Our High Priest

14 We have a great high priest who has gone into heaven. He is Jesus the Son of God. So let us hold on to the faith we have. 15 For our high priest is able to understand our weaknesses. He was tempted in every way that we are, but he did not sin. 16 Let us, then, feel free to come before God’s throne. Here there is grace. And we can receive mercy and grace to help us when we need it.
Hebrews 4:1-16

I remember the first time I heard the lyrics to For Your Glory by Tasha Cobbs Leonard. I could not crying and praising God. I remember the first time hearing sweet Anissa sing it and others and even being in the choir alongside her singing this song. And God I’m thinking of the first time I heard my sweet Shanya sing this song. I don’t think I cried that much in church besides when I heard Eva and Mariam sing; but it was something about the innocence of Shanya that captivated my heart.

The song says:

Lord if I
Find favor in Your sight
Lord please
Hear my hearts cry
I'm desperately waiting
To be where You are
I'll cross the hottest desert
I'll travel near or far
For Your glory
I will do anything
Just to see You
To behold You as my King
For Your glory
I will do anything
Just to see you
To behold You as my King
Lord if I find favor in Your sight
Lord please, Lord please (Lord please)
Hear my hearts cry (hear my hearts cry)
I'm desperately waiting (I'm desperately waiting)
To be where You are (to be where You are)
I'll cross the hottest desert (I'll cross the hottest desert)
I'll travel near or far
For Your glory (for Your glory)
I will do (I will do) anything (anything)
Just to see You (just to see You)
To behold You as my King (to behold You as my King)
For Your glory (for Your glory)
I will do anything (I will do anything) oh yeah I will
Because I wanna see you (just to see You)
To behold You as my King (to behold You as my King)
For Your glory (I want it I want it)
I will do anything (I will do anything, I will do anything to see you)
Just to see You as Jehovah
To behold You as my King
I wanna be where You are (I really wanna be there)
I gotta be where You are
I wanna be where You are
I gotta be where You are
I wanna be where You are
Gotta be where You are (I wanna be there)
I wanna be where You are
Gotta be where You are
For Your glory
I will do anything
Just to see You
To behold You as my King
I wanna be where You are
Peace is where You are
Joy is where You are
And love is who You are

So Lord as I sit here looking in the mirror thanking you for blessing me with another year of life I cry out FOR YOUR GLORY, I WILL DO ANYTHING…JUST TO SEE YOU…TO BEHOLD YOU AS MY KING..I WANT TO BE WHERE YOU ARE…I GOTTA BE WHERE YOU ARE.

Lord I come humbly before Your throne of grace asking for forgiveness. Lord I am a sinner, and I fall short every time. Daddy always said, “a hard head makes a soft behind.” So I openly admit God, my behind is soft (figuratively).

As I hum the lyrics to For Your Glory I wholeheartedly want to do EVERYTHING I can do please you God and I know in my weakness I allow fear, doubt, insecurities, and being stubborn at times and stray away from the way You would have me to go. MANY of times you told me to rest but I kept on going. You’ve given me many wake up calls and even prepared time for rest by way of carpel tunnel surgery and what did I do? A day or two later I’m working and doing the very things that put me in a cast in the first place. Why is that God?

Oh yeah, I just talked about being disobedient.

Not to try and justify me being hard headed, but I truly just want to try and make a difference and show folks how good you are. You have been so good to me, even in the midst of my struggle YOU ARE SO GOOD TO ME! You’ve been better than good to me, better than I could ever be to myself. And I just want the world to know that I LOVE YOU LORD!!!! With every breath in my body, I BLESS YOUR HOLY NAME!

Going back to scripture, Hebrews 4:16 reads: Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in the time of need.

Behind this smile no one really knows how many tears I cry, no one knows how many nights I lay awake at time, no one really knows the burdens I bear but You do Lord and your grace is sufficient.

I read something a long time ago that resonated well with me. It said something like don’t vent to the people who can use it against you and do nothing to help you, but take it to God who is the only one who can help (in Whitnee’s words). And so that’s why I learned to do. I mean let’s be honest do people really care about finances, car troubles, body aches, high light bill, being overworked and underpaid, feeling used at times, and the other stuff that comes with life?! I mean some may but we all have our own issues even if your issues are my struggles but we all are dealing with something right?!

And so out of that the only thing I know how to do is to use it to encourage someone else. I be sitting here looking plump fool because I just know these last couple of months have been HELL but I stay with a grateful heart because even in the moments I felt like I just wanted to throw my hands up and give in to the “easy money” or “instant gratification” just so I would not have to stress about stuff, I’ve been faithful and given it to You God and every time YOU’VE MADE A WAY!!! Even when it has seemed to be no way!!!! YOU’VE DONE IT AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN!!!

I’m sure it’s because I was so busy trying to figure out my mess that I failed to yield, stop, rest, pray, and wait that I’ve brought things on myself but all in all I want folks to know that YOU ARE GOOD!!!

Today is my birthday yes and I’m grateful but it’s not about me celebrating me today, it’s about me showing folks the reason why I smile, showing folks the reason why I wake up in the morning ready to do what God has placed on my heart to do, it’s the reason I made a mini feast for family on my birthday weekend to show people even when our lights might get caught off, even when our car sitting in the yard broke down and we work 3 jobs and still can’t afford to fix it, even when people think you have all the money in the world (and they don’t how much you rob Peter to pay Paul) or overextend yourself just to keep food on the table and a roof over my kids head, it’s the reason why I pour my time and energy into helping clothes folks or present them with nice FREE items through Dolly’s House, I pay for this blog website I can’t even afford at times (BUT GOD HAS KEPT IT GOING FOR OVER 7+ years) and the reason why I cater and show love through your bellies by way of Spry’s Durty Kitchen or give of myself for 15 years at DJJ (and have been overlooked MANY TIMES and given tasks I don’t get paid for) and everything else not because I’m so secure and got it all together because I’M A MESS!!!…because despite it all YOU ARE WORTHY OF ALL MY PRAISE!!!!!

I’m running (can’t run my knee hurting) through my house like Mrs. Doubtfire or Kevin on Home Alone right now shouting GOD YOU ARE GOOD AND WORTHY OF ALL MY PRAISE!!!! I could have been dead and gone but you kept me. I could have been in my grave but you saw fit to bless me with life this morning. I could have been on the street Lord but you have kept BOA from taking my home. I could have been in the dark, but SCE&G still getting enough to keep the lights on. I could have woke up hungry but you sent me a horse nose friend to pick me up since my car is down and take me to the food bank because I didn’t have money to buy the food myself and YOU BLESSED ME to not be stingy but share with others and prepare a meal with them out of the goodness of my heart just to get black folks together to stop fussing and fighting but loving on one another and letting them know GOD IS STILL ON THE THRONE!! OH HELP ME FATHER I FEEL THE SPIRIT MOVING IN ME AND I’M GLAD ABOUT IT!!!

Pre-birthday shenanigans
Pre-birthday shenanigans

Sisters and brothers I need ya’ll to know that God is still blessing His people. God has never left us. His Word is true. He will never leave us or forsake us. Even though it feels like I have been on a financial decline since I had to walk away from a supervisory role that was stealing my peace, God is still good! Yes we need money to survive but I NEED JESUS!!! My relationship with God is far more important than man’s dollar. Trump can’t get me into Heaven or Hell and if I stress about how he trying to send Black folks back to plantations heck I might as well dig my own grave now. I WORSHIP GOD I DON’T WORSHIP MAN!!!! Orange, black, blue, yellow or white. I PRAISE GOD!!! I give Him all the honor and glory!

Some of y’all probably thinking Whitnee’ done lost her marbles. “Nah bruh” I didn’t loose 💩 I’m just sick and tired of being sick and tired of being being self centered, ungrateful, blind, deaf, and ignorant to see God wants our attention. Cancer is killing our babies, husbands are killing their wives, millionaires tearing down mansions just to built baseball fields when it’s more people downtown homeless and on the streets up and down Two Notch than I can count on my hands and feet, people not dying old they dying younger and younger, and the list can go on.

I’m not writing this message for a hand out because I’m going to work if that’s the last thing I can do and I’m not going to rob my neighbor to get it so don’t think this post is a GoFundMe attempt because God is my PROVIDER and I had to learn that the hard way when God took away from increase, body got sick and couldn’t work all those slave hours, when folks stop placing orders and started overlooking Spry’s Durty Kitchen…God STILL PROVIDED and my kids might not have gotten everything they wanted but I thank God HE IS GIVING US EVERYTHING WE NEED!!!

It’s time for the church to start being the church. It’s time for us to stop judging one another and acting like our 💩 don’t stink. It’s time to stop turning our nose up at folks like we are holier and mightier than thou. New flash people: YOU AIN’T PERFECT, and your 💩 don’t smell like roses neither! Folks walking like they thong too tight up their behind, come one somebody. Don’t want to invite the unhomed to church because they smell, they can’t tithe, or because “they always want something.” Well excuse me but you sitting high up on the hill and still smell like you brushed your teeth with cat litter, haven’t washed in days, or look like you been in the trap all night. IM SICK OF IT!!!!!

We’ve got to get back to being folks who love one another and love God! He is not the creator of our problems, most times we are BUT HE IS THE EVER PRESENT HELP IN TIME OF NEED.

Oh you mad at me for being “too real!”?! Well sorry NOT SORRY, it’s my birthday and I’ll cry and SPEAK TRUTH if I want to OUT OF LOVE because we’ve got to come together and LIFT EACH OTHER UP!!!!

Now that I got that out, let me straighten my crown and go back to the word of God.

Hebrews 5:1-4 reads: For every high priest taken from among men is appointed for men in things pertaining to God, that he may offer both gifts and sacrifices for sin. He can have compassion on those who are ignorant and going astray, since he himself is also subject to weakness. Because of this he is required as for the people, so also for himself, to offer sacrifices for sins. And no man takes this honor to himself, but he who is called by God, just as Aaron was.

After reading this last passage of Scripture (Hebrews 5:1-4) what does this mean to you? What do you think God is saying to the reader? Take time to reflect for a moment when you can.

And then the Bible goes on to tell us in Chapter 5 verses 6-14:

And in another Scripture God says,

“You are a priest forever,
a priest like Melchizedek.”[b] Psalm 110:4
7 While Jesus lived on earth, he prayed to God and asked God for help. He prayed with loud cries and tears to the One who could save him from death. And his prayer was heard because he left it all up to God. 8 Even though Jesus was the Son of God, he learned to obey by what he suffered. 9 And he became our perfect high priest. He gives eternal salvation to all who obey him. 10 And God made Jesus high priest, a priest like Melchizedek.

Warning Against Falling Away

11 We have much to say about this. But it is hard to explain because you are so slow to understand. 12 You have had enough time so that by now you should be teachers. But you need someone to teach you again the first lessons of God’s message. You still need the teaching that is like milk. You are not ready for solid food. 13 Anyone who lives on milk is still a baby. He knows nothing about right teaching. 14 But solid food is for those who are grown up. They are mature enough to know the difference between good and evil.

The title of today’s message is Falling short, Lord please forgive me. Earlier I publicly admitted I am far from perfect and I too am a sinner, I am a mess and more, but all in all I play you see the MESSAGE out of my MESS. God placed it on my heart to tell each of you that is reading this message or that will read this message that it is not too late for you to come to Him. If He can use my broke down butt to try and be a blessing to others, I KNOW HE CAN USE YOU! From where I’m looking, YOU ARE LOOKING REAL GOOD!! Whatever walk of life you are from, social status, ethnicity, whichever walk of faith you are on are still deciding if you even believe God can use you!

In all seriousness while I choose to sit here trusting in God blindly with my shortcomings and struggles, there may be one reading this message feeling hopeless right now. There might be someone contemplating ending their own life because the road has gotten so tough. There might be someone about to go do something that will end them behind bars because they don’t see another way out. My brothers and sisters all I came to tell you today is that God is the truth, the way and the ——. Fill in the blank as you speak God’s word this morning. Breathe peace, love and joy into the atmosphere as I begin to close out this chapter of my journey in Christ today.

I don’t know who all needed to hear all about my imperfections to know that God is good but I pray you see just how good He is. In Children’s Church yesterday Joshua said, “Mrs. Whitnee’ why do you smile so much?” All I could do is smile and say because God is good to me.

Y’all I don’t know what tomorrow is going to bring. I don’t know where the words written out of love that I shared today will lead me but I’m so grateful that I decided to speak boldly in love with the quiet time God has blessed me with on my 38th birthday. I was missing the world out of my momma and daddy as I prepared for Dr. Dobson’s Book Release (if you haven’t gotten your copy PLEASE GO on Amazon and get it today it is called Belong and is available now) and as I sat thinking of all the delicious foods my parents prepared growing up and decided to recreate them my way and share with others and my tears led me to read God’s word. And for that I’m so grateful to God!

In conclusion, I earnestly hope that you allow God’s presence to bring peace into your heart. I pray His word brings joy into your soul. I pray His blessings bring you comfort that in return you are able to continue to bless others. Allow God to use you to minister to other people. Sometimes He allows us to suffer not because of disobedience, but so the faithfulness you have in Him, will lead others to Christ. The songwriter says…we all need somebody to lean on. The Bible says, but exhort one another daily, while it is called “Today,” lest any of you be hardened through deceitfulness of sin. So my birthday wish is that my brothers and sisters in Christ will shine their lights and lead folks to Christ through their walk of faith, through how they live, and by whom they give all honor and glory to. It’s a dark world out here and we have so many lost souls, but God’s light is never dim and His grace is sufficient. May God’s word be edified and His name be glorified. Amen. Glory to God.

Side note: I fell short where the Bible talks about in Hebrews 3:18-19 of be disobedient to His promises of blessing me. Not that He could do it because I know He could, but that He would because I find myself unworthy. God’s word never died, it is alive and powerful the Bible says sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. I’m steadily seeking that change within my outwardly doing and my spiritual immaturity that God’s word has the power to provoke. Remove Whitnee’ and increase You Heavenly Father so You can use me up dear God! I want to bless Your name through InspirationAllAroundMe, Dolly’s House, and Spry’s Durty Kitchen I want people to know it’s not Rico & Whitnee’ but it’s You and You alone. I gave you my marriage a long time ago, I gave you my kids, I gave you me in my brokenness and grief of missing my mom and dad, but Lord I give you Whitnee’ today that is learning how to heal and be whole again. I’m tired of holding on to the hurts of my past, I’m tired of worrying about what I don’t have and what I could do better for my kids but God I give you Whitnee’ out of my nothingness. I don’t have much to offer but God I give you me today Lord, it’s not my will but Yours Lord and I’m here crying out Your Holy Name, I need you God. RIGHT NOW I NEED YOU FATHER. Lord please allow me to grow in spirit so I can be a better helpmate, a better mother, a better sister, a better aunt, a better God mother, a better friend, a better coworker, just a better Whitnee’. Thank you for your grace and thank you for loving me in spite of my failures and disobedience and every time I disappointment you Lord. Your Word says But solid food belongs to those who are full age, that is, those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern both good and evil. Lord it is my closing prayer that I continue to seek You in every aspect of my being so that I one day can able to look more like Jesus. For it is in the name of Your son Jesus I pray, Amen.

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