Whitnee's journey with Christ

This past week my husbands side of the family experienced great loss. Within 24 hours, he had lost an aunt, cousin, and his step father. It was so much to take in at once, so many to console, so much to process, yet God brought comfort and peace in the most unique way.

There were wakes, there were funeral services and while the family was busy planning I was trying to figure out how to best support my husband, his siblings, and the family while still processing the loss of my mom. Although she had passed away in March and several months had passed, it still felt like yesterday that I saw her last.

Many people around me had experienced losses of their own but I hadn’t had the stomach to attend their funerals. I had been so wrapped up in work lately that I didn’t have the time to show support but truth be told I didn’t think I could handle it anyway. I didn’t want to seem like a bad friend but that’s just how I felt- I wasn’t ready.

So with my husband loosing three in one week this was HUGE and I knew for his sake- I would have to allow God to give me strength while putting on my “big girl panties!”

Rico’s step father funeral was on Thursday and I knew out of all of the services, I must attend this service to support my brother and sister in laws. With so many different emotions festering in my mind, God gave me peace. He removed the fear in my heart of thinking I was going to panic with peace and comfort knowing I must support those grieving the loss of their father.

The services were beautiful! The pastor that had delivered the eulogy did an amazing job. He preached like I’ve never heard a man preach at a funeral. He wasn’t preaching to the deceased, he was preaching to the living.

He had made a point in his message that stood out to me. He made a valid point about life and death and he said before we die why not give our lives to Christ so we can live in Christ and not die and go to a sinners hell. This was something that I’ve heard since I was a young person growing up in church but it was something about HOW he said it that just made perfect sense.

Going in I was nervous and had a heavy heart but coming out I felt lifted, I felt peace, I felt free!

That freedom lit the path into my weekend.

Later on that night (Thursday) my husband and I went to my mother in laws house. She had prepared a “lovers lane” themed tent event in honor of our 14-year wedding anniversary and all I can say is, it was simply enchanting. I felt like Cinderella and the tent was my ball. I had never had anyone do anything remarkably close to what she had done for us. It took great planning, lots of coordination, an abundance of love, and let’s not forget, money!!!

My mom was normally the one who would write a sweet note to Rico and I for our anniversary and I knew I was going to miss that this year but the thing is, I didn’t! I didn’t have to because I felt my moms presence at the mother in laws house. I felt that she had given my mother in law a sense of what we would like and God allowed her mother’s instinct to kick in ten fold. I’m still blushing just thinking about all she did.

Friday rolled around and Rico and I were beach bound. We had both been working so much lately that it was nice to get away and just be husband and wife. We had a remarkable time. It felt like God stopped the clock and allowed us to love on each other. In the midst of so much death, so much pain, so much sickness, so many struggles, and so much sadness- we were happy. We were at peace, I’d never felt so in love.

We’d had some rough patches like all marriages and it was needed at this time just to be with one another. No work, no kids, no responsibilities, no stress, just Rico and Whitnee’. We laughed, we danced, we talked, we lived without a care in the world.

We came back and I felt like we were still on the same lovers lane since Thursday. It made all the disagreements, disappointments, failures, and struggles worth it because through it all- our love won! God wins!

It’s like the honeymoon we never had!

It felt good just to be. No alarms, no emails, no ma this or ma that, no dogs barking, no sound of construction…just God’s peace and the sound of His beautiful earth.

Not having the day to day duties of being mommy, wife, coworker, supervisor, homeowner, dog owner, friend, aunt, cousin, etc. felt good for a few days.

I’m viewing life so much differently since Thursday. I’m learning how to embrace Whitnee’. I’m learning how to embrace my beauty. I’m learning how to embrace my body. I’m learning how to not be so tense and upright. Im loving life unscripted.

And to think, the best is yet to come?!!!!